Why oh why

I have this tendency to feel jealous of fabric characters, just because they have better sex life's, or sweeter mates than me.
I read about these passionate kisses and embraces, and can't help but think, maybe I'm missing out on something?

I mean I've been kissed and had sex and all the naughty stuff, but I've never really had that spark moment. You know that moment when you think, this is GREAT! Maybe it's because of the things that happened to me in the past? Is that why? Maybe I'm just weird or too untrusting, or just to traumatized. I dunno, I guess I just long for the guy that makes me feel pretty even when I know I'm not.